The very best of My Immortal
It was an ugly preppy man wif no nose and red eyes *''Sudenly a gothic old man flu in on his broomstick. He had lung black hair and a looong black bread. He wus werring a blak robe dat sed ‘avril lavigne’ on da back. He shotted a spel and Vlodemort ran away. It was…………………………………DUMBLYDORE!'' *''We flew there on our brooms. Mine was black and the broom-stuff was blood-red.'' *''They dyed in a car crash'' *''Draco’s black Mercy-Bens (geddit cuz wer gpffik) that his dad Lucian gave him. We did pot, coke and crak'' *''put on some black eyeliner, black eyesharrow'' *''We started to talk about who was sexier, Mikey or Gerard Way or Billie Joe Armstrong. The boys joined in cause they were bi'' *''he had died his hare black'' *''All day we sat angerly finking about Dumbelldore'' *''“No one fucking understands me!1” he shouted angrily as his black hare went in his big blue eyes like Billie Joe in Boulevard of Borken Dreamz.'' *''black high held boots and a cross belly fing'' *''“Accuse me? What about me!” I growled.'' *''Suddenly Hargrid came. He had appearated'' *''“Hey I need to ask you a question.” he said, pulling out his black wanabe-goffik purse. “What are u wearing to the concert?” “U no who MCR r!” I gasped. “No I just saw there was a concert dat a lot of gothz and punx were going 2.” He said. “Anyway Draco has a surprise for u.”'' *''with urple lace stuff all over it, an black gothic compact boots'' *''Den I gasped…………………………………………………………….Snake and Loopin were in da middle of da empty hall, doin it, and Dobby was watching!1'' *''“It wuz to blackmail u.” I snarked. “So now next time you see me doing it with my boyfriend you cant fuking rat me out or I’ll show dis to Dumbledork'' *'' “Draco are u okay?” I asked in a gothic voice'' *''“Its ok Enoby.” said Vampire comfortly'' *''I love sensitive bi guyz. (if ur a homophone den fuk of!)'' *''Vampire got out his blak invincibility coke'' *''Vampire said under his breast in a disgusted way'' *'' but it was 2 late cuz now we were ruining away frum him. And den we saw Draco crying n bustin in2 tearz and slitting his rists outside of da school'' *''We went back to our coffins frenching each other'' *''my eyes rolled up and suddenly I had a vision of something that was happening now. There was a knok on the door and Fug and da Mystery of Magic walked into the school!1'' *''All day everyone talked about the Misery of Magic. Well anyway, I woke up the next day. I was in my coffin so I opened the door. I was wearing blak lacey leather pajamas. Then I gasped. Standing in front of me where………………. B;loody Mary, Vampire, Diabolo, Draco, Dracula and Willow!'' *''He had raped them and stuff before too. They all got so depressed that they became goffik and converted to Stanism'' *''“OMFG” I yielded as I jumped up. “Why the fuck are u all here?” “Enoby something is really fucked up.” Draco said. “OK but I need to put my fucking clothes on first.” I shouted angrily.'' *''Dumbledore had constipated the cideo camera they took of me naked.'' *''“You saved me from getting a Paris Hilton p- video made from your shower scene and being vued by Snap and Loopin.” Who MASTABATED (c is dat speld rong) to it he added silently.'' *''“2 c wht iz n da flmes(HAHA U REVIEWRS FLAMES GEDDIT) u mst find urslf 1st, k?” “I HAVE FOUND MYSELF OK YOU MEAN OLD MAN!”'' *''Vampire was in the Hair of Magical Magic Creatures.'' *''“STOP IT NOW YOU HORNY SIMPLETONS!” shouted Professor McGoggle who was watching us and so was everyone else.'' *''Just then he started to scream. “OMFG! NOOOOO! MY SCAR HURTS!” and then….. his eyes rolled up! You could only see his red whites.'' *''Then he had a brainstorm. “I had an idea!” he exclaimed.'' *''We ran in with our wands out just as we heard a croon voice say. “Allah Kedavra!” It was……………………………….. Voldemort!'' *''“Rid my sight you despicable preps!” he shouted as we started shooting him with the gun he Then suddenly he looked at me and he fell down with a lovey-dovey look in his eyes. “EbonyIloveyouwiluhavesexwithme.” he said.'' *''“Im good at too many things! WHY CAN’T I JUST BE NORMAL? IT’S A FUCKING CURSE!”'' *''I did sum advanced Biology work. I was turning a bloody pentagram into a black guitar. Suddenly the guitar turned to Draco!''